The People vs. Nicola Sturgeon
Holyrood courtroom drama as the First Minister comes under cross-examination.
This is my sketch of First Minister’s Questions, held on Thursday, May 12, 2022.
Adjourn the Wagatha Christie trial. Dismiss all proceedings in Johnny Depp vs. Amber Heard.
If it’s courtroom drama you’re after, First Minister’s Questions had you covered. Shock revelations from the prosecution. A feisty defence from the accused. More missing evidence and legal intrigue than a Perry Mason/Rumpole of the Bailey crossover.
Leading the cross-examination was Douglas Ross. The First Minister's government had ‘finally found the missing documents in its ferries fiasco,’ he alliterated, as he scrutinised Sturgeon’s secret Scotland.
Transport minister Jenny Gilruth told MSPs on Wednesday that the missing Ferguson Marine memo had been located. That was some impressive Jessica Fletchering, when even Audit Scotland had concluded the ministerial order may never have existed. If Gilruth can find a document that well-hidden, we need to get her looking for Shergar, Lord Lucan and the economic case for independence.
'For weeks,' Ross teed up, 'Nicola Sturgeon has stood in this chamber and told MSPs Derek Mackay signed off the vital contract for Ferguson Marine to build replacement ferries. But Operation Blame Derek Mackay has a fatal flaw: this new document, previously hidden from the public, reveals the person who signed the deal at the final stage was the Deputy First Minister.'
'Honest John’s hands are all over this dodgy deal,' Ross crowed.
'All that Douglas Ross is displaying right now is his own utter desperation,' Sturgeon spat, before reading select parts of the emails aloud. It was 'obvious' from these passages, she maintained, 'that the Deputy First Minister did not take the decision'.
Running things past the finance secretary was 'not unusual', she said, adding: 'Douglas Ross should know that is how government works. Of course Douglas Ross does not know how government works and, on recent evidence, Douglas Ross is unlikely to ever know how government works.'
Narrator: Douglas Ross is a former government minister.
He held up a copy of the belatedly released papers. The government, he explained, had 'done such a poor job of redacting the documents that, if they are copied and pasted into Microsoft Word, the information is revealed'.
Absolute silence. Grave faces across the front bench. As Scooby Doo used to say: 'Ruh-roh'.
The redacting error revealed the line: 'The impact of a successful legal challenge could be high — in the worst case the contract could be declared ineffective.'
'It is clear to everyone why she and her government wanted that redacted,' Ross said. 'It is now in the public domain.'
Ooft.
Sturgeon claimed Ross had undermined his own case because 'it did not come to pass that the contract was legally challenged'. Yes, First Minister. Everything's gone swimmingly.
Ross turned up the heat: 'The stench of cover-up and corruption is running through this whole sorry affair. If the First Minister will not come clean, let's get John Swinney on the stand.'
The Tory leader challenged Swinney to appear before Holyrood that afternoon for questioning. The offer was not taken up and Sturgeon again branded Ross 'desperate'.
The prosecution did not rest there.
Anas Sarwar challenged Sturgeon to 'confirm how many investigations into bullying by current or former SNP cabinet ministers there have been' and 'whether those investigations have concluded and what the outcomes of those investigations are'.
'I am not in a position to get into these issues because I am bound by very considerable legal data protection issues,' Sturgeon replied, reminding him the Holyrood Inquiry had noted the importance of confidentiality around complaints.
'That committee also found the First Minister guilty of misleading this parliament,' Sarwar deadpanned. 'I don't think she should forget that either.'
Sturgeon insisted she took complaints 'very seriously' and was merely following the law, prompting Sarwar to accuse her of 'a culture of secrecy and cover-up' and 'a culture of contempt for journalists and anyone who dares to ask a difficult question of the First Minister'.
It's taken a while but at last the opposition is doing some opposing.
Originally published in the Scottish Daily Mail on May 13, 2022.
The opposition need to continue putting the boot in. Obfuscation and cover-up, with the assistance of compliant Scottish media, allow these charlatans to continue operating Secret Scotland. If ‘Honest John’ truly didn’t know the financial implications of the lack of a guarantee in the ferry deal, then as Finance Minister at the time he should resign for gross incompetence. Fat chance.
The way forward must be for the opposition parties in Holyrood to unite to fight with an agreed plan to oust the toxic SNP. For goodness sake put your differences aside (if they really are differences ) and WORK TOGETHER for Scotland